SO I figure someone is playing a cruel joke on me by adding 3 extra days into this week. I cannot believe how long this Friday has taken to come. At least it seems that I have been smoking much less than previous weeks. Lets see if we can keep that trend up.
Loverboy called today. He seemed more his typical self. We talked for a bit - he asked me if I was excited to go out on Monday. WHat the hell was that? Should I be excited to go to a movie with him? WTF? I felt kinda played while he talked about that. I mentioned that until that day comes... I doubt he will show. I think that if his girl cancels work or something comes up with her... he won't come with me. Let me down once again. I think he likes doing that. Screwing with me. I almost thought of cancelling.. but really who would i go see the movie with?
(ok. I want to go see it with him... we all know that) WHY else did i ask him? Today I am bitter and selfish. FUck it all to hell I say.
Still no word from the Miner. Something is definitely up with that.
I did though - receive a call from BIGBOY> haven't talked to him in a long long time. I don't like that he is talking about coming down to visit before I return up north. I know i don't love him or anything like that. I don't even think that I want to continue a sexual relationship with him - 12 years of meaningless sex was more than enough. Besides I don't want a move in lover. He is such the move in boy. Too bad... if only he would want something better for his life. He just wants nothing to better his life. Who the hell doesn't work for 10 years? Who ? I just don't understand it at all. I guess he just hasn't found something to make it all better? who knows?
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